I'm Just a Kid
by Silvel-chan
Summary: Turning his head, he could see the dots of rain that clung to the window, as well as the steady streams that dragged many down with them. In the end they’d all go down together. None of them alone.


BP: Hello everyone

**BP: **Hello everyone. BananaPlant here! Um…so yeah. This is my first DeathNote story and what not. I've been into the series for quite a bit now and I've never actually had the courage to attempt one of these things. So…comments (advice especially) would be welcomed greatly? XD

Disclaimer: I sadly own nothing…at all…see these clothes? Not even mine. And the song is I'm Just a Kid by Simple Plan

/

**I'm Just a Kid**

Rain. It was raining again. Come to think of it, hadn't it been storming all week? The small, white-haired boy at thought so, but he hadn't exactly been focusing on the whether so much as he was his puzzle. Of course when it was the dead of night and everything was supposed to be silent…it was kind of hard not to notice the insistent pounding of the large drops of water hitting the roof.

_I woke up it was 7_

_I waited till 11_

_Just to figure out that no one would call_

Slowly, Near slid his feet out from under the covers of his bed and began to sit up. It wasn't like he actually slept at night, anyway. He was usually up thinking. About what? Anything and everything that would enter his head. He never did sleep much, but he did get enough in to function properly. At one point Roger had even suggested that that was why he played with his toys so much that it was his body's way of going into a meditative state to rest. Near simply declined that explanation.

_I think I got a lot of friends but I don't hear from them_

_What's another night all alone?_

_When your spending everyday on your own_

Near played with his toys because they were his friends. They didn't judge him like the other kids did, and they didn't push him around like certain other ones. Turning his head, he could see the dots of rain that clung to the window, as well as the steady streams that dragged many down with them. In the end they'd all go down together. None of them alone.

_And here it goes_

The soft sound of socked feet padding across the floor was the only sound the filled the hallway beside the light patter of rain. Of course it only made sense. It was three o'clock in the morning so it was unlikely that other kids would be up and about. He didn't mind though. He _liked_ it. He liked the loneliness that crept up every time he would find himself alone. He didn't mind when he was on the only one in the common room and he didn't care about the emotion that would threaten to sweep over him as he'd get up from his puzzle to take a small glance out the window so he could see the other kids having fun. Together. Because he wasn't supposed to feel, feelings were for those who were mentally weak.

_I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare_

_I'm just a kid and I know that it's not fair_

Near sat down slowly, drawing his knee up to his chest as he set down his white puzzle, slipping out the contents so he could start over from scratch. This time he chose to sit next to the window so every now and then he could glance out into the rain soaked yard. His pale fingers began the process of fitting the pieces into their designated spot as his mind began to wonder. Wonder like it always did, because he could never talk about what was on his mind. Because there was never anyone there to listen or care about the opinions of the emotionless boy that was so perfect, so emotionless, and so arrogant that he acted as though his toys were the only ones important enough for that pleasure.

_Nobody cares, cause I'm alone and the world is_

_Having more fun then me_

_Tonight…_

No. He was mistaken. He didn't like it. He didn't like the feeling of loneliness, and he didn't like not having anyone to talk to. Though the only person that could even begin to even understand what went on in his head was the one person that seemed to hate him most of all. Maybe that was why when the blonde would get mad and take it on Near, he'd let him. Maybe that was why the last time Mello had thrown a punch his way, he simply let the blonde do what he wanted, let him hurt him. Because he wanted Mello to try and understand him. But he didn't mind. As long as Mello hated him though, he was at least paying him attention. He wasn't alone in that aspect, he always had Mello trailing behind him.

How can someone ruled by emotion, understand someone who couldn't show them though?

_And when the night is dead, I'll crawl into my bed_

_Staring at the four walls again_

_I'll try and think about the last time, I had a good time_

_Everyone's got somewhere to go_

Near twirled idly at a lock of hair as he watched the white pieces click together. It always amazed him how so many pieces, so many _different_ pieces, could fit together surprisingly well.

_And They're going to leave me here on my own_

_And here it goes_

Over half the puzzle was finished by now, and nimble hands continued to click different ones into place at an almost rapid pace. Now there was talk going around about how close it was coming for L to choose a successor. More tests would be given out, and eyes would be on the top two students. Ears would open for awaiting one; some ready to congratulate Near while others would be hoping Mello would finally knock him off his pedestal. Even Matt, the third top student, would get nudges of encouragement (though goodness knows none of them came from Mello) to try harder so he could catch the great L's eye. Why bother though? When the time actually came, L would just come up with an excuse not to pick anyone yet. He never could decide.

_I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare_

_I'm just a kid I know that it's not fair_

_Nobody cares, cause I'm alone in the world is_

_Having more fun then me_

Then everything would calm down and everyone would go back to ignoring him or hating him. Just leaving him alone in general. He'd go back to playing with his toys and listening to Mello rant at him about being arrogant, and Matt in the background chuckling as he followed the blonde around like the dog he was.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

_Don't fit in with anybody_

_How did this happen to me?_

It was then that he realized one of his puzzle pieces had disappeared. It was one right in the middle, and he couldn't seem to find it anywhere. He lifted the puzzle up and searched underneath is and around his legs, even standing up to make sure his hadn't gotten caught on his pajamas. Sighing, he looked out the window as he tried to figure out where it most likely would have fallen out at. He leaned closer against the rain soaked window until he could see a pair of children out playing in the rain.

_Wide awake and I'm bored and I can't fall asleep_

_And every night is the worst night ever._

"Mello…Matt." The names seemed so foreign to him. He watched as the blonde and the red head kicked at the water and pushed each other down. That same feeling of loneliness washed over him again. Now that he thought about it, all three of them could almost be compared to the rain he had seen outside his bedroom window.

_I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare_

_I'm just a kid I know I know that it's not fair_

_Nobody cares, cause I'm alone and the world is_

_Having more fun then me_

Except he knew that someday they'd go down together, and leave him all alone.

_I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare_

_I'm just a kid I know that it's not fair_

_Nobody cares, cause I'm alone and the world is_

_Nobody wants to be alone in the word_

Because that was how it was meant to be. Near was just a kid, even more so then the others around him. He silently picked up his puzzle and started heading back to his room, hoping he could go to sleep for once.

_I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare_

_I'm just a kid I know that it's not fair_

_Nobody cares cause I'm alone and the world is_

_Nobody wants to be alone in the word_

"Hey, was that Near?" Matt had stopped his running to look at one of the windows of the Whammy House, swearing he had seen a white figure by the translucent glass.

"Who cares?" Came Mello's response, wiping water from his eyes only to have more fall into his vision. "It if it, just leave him be. Little pansy likes being by himself."

_Nobody cares cause I'm alone and the world is_

_Having more fun then me_

"Oh, hey! You'll never guess what I swiped from Near's room while he was gone. You know that stupid puzzles he's always working on?"

_I'm all alone tonight_

_Nobody cares tonight_

_Cause I'm just a kid tonight_

/

**BP: **Well? I know it sorta sucked, but I guess I'm really not use to being in-character with these guys. XD. Anyway, drop a comment and let me know what you thought about it. I wasn't sure about the ending (cause I really just wanted to use the rest of the lyrics) so I kind of just through it together.


End file.
